Pink Slips - Everybody's Doin' It
Looking at porn, that is. Don’t even try to pretend I’m not talking about YOU.
Your parents did it, and their parents did it, and their parents, and their grandparents, and their great-great-great-great-great-grand-Biblical parents, all the way back to the beginning of recorded human history.
Ever since our monkey ancestors (shut up, you creationist eedjits: if you don’t believe in evolution, stop using your thumbs to text and masturbate) started making cave paintings of the dirty deed, humans have been creating visual depictions of all the interesting ways we can bone each other.
Why? I didn’t know, so I had to do some actual research for this post. Though it was much deeper research than I normally do. Much. Deeper. The things I do for you….
Hot Upper Paleolithic (40,000 to 10,000 years ago) cave paintings and carvings show an abiding fascination with the penis. Because most societies were (still are, hello!) patriarchal, the phallus was symbolic of power, control, fertility, social stability and continuity, signaling the dominance of male sexuality and the survival of the human race’s dependence on the male member’s – perkiness.
And what does a male member need to stay perky? Boobs, apparently. The 24,000-year-old Venus of Willendorf carves a straight line to a table at Hooter’s and your father’s crinkled Playboys. (Sorry, but it’s time you knew about that. As if you didn’t already.)
In second century B.C. India, the Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana propagated sex as a path to spiritual enlightenment. At about the same time, the Moche people of ancient Peru painted sexual scenes on ceramic pottery. The aristocracy in 16th century Japan were fond of erotic woodblock prints, while at the same time, the Italian Renaissance produced a body of art and literature that reflected a culture of (uncircumcised) frank, open sexuality charged with political and gender power dynamics.
Apparently, our ancestors felt little or no shame about their bodies, or about their need for visual stimuli. We know that the ancient Greeks and Romans created public sculptures and frescos portraying hetero and homo sex, threesomes, fellatio and cunnilingus. The doomed city of Pompeii incorporated the erect penis into their everyday art with domestic paintings, statues and bowls illustrating eager youths and maidens frolicking with reckless abandon. But they’re all dead now. Coincidence?
Today, of course, we have instant access millions of erotic images on the Internets. Just Google “sex” and take a few years to browse over half a billion results. And that’s just in English.
Forbes.com cites sources that estimate the domestic porn market is worth anywhere from $2.6 to $14 billion in annual sales – somewhere between the GDP of Brazil and the United States.
I’ll leave the debate over the social consequences of easily available porn to another post. I just wanted to prime the pump… so to speak.
Post your reply to this question: How old were you when you first saw a pornographic image, and how did you feel about it?
Today’s Sexy Submission: Whew, that was a lot of hyperlinks. Have you noticed that they don’t all point to Wikipedia? I do some work for you people. I hope you appreciate it. Especially when I find stuff like this.